(When I wrote this, I was pulled out of bed to do it, having read it, I found it is quite cool and very enjoyable, hope you find the same, poet)

Hugs ya , how are you, my friend.

OK, pull up a chair and have a seat and share your day with me, just let things flow, I’m all ears

hugs ya heaps, giggles, ok, wanna cuppa coffee, tea or something stronger, you can smoke if you want to as well. I will just throw a log on the fire and then I will get to sit back down again and you watch my cat invade my lap again

ahhh that’s better, right when were me, my friend, ahhh yes you were saying about your day.

what a day you are having, makes mine look boring, giggles

ok, I may be able to help, let me think for a second.

right, you have 4 options that you can try at this stage

you can let it really get you down or really get at you,

you can get angry about it and wind yourself up til you explode

you can accept that it has happened and look for the positive in it

you can understand why it has happened and how it come about

yeah, I understand how you feel about it, just letting you talking about it

shows me that you do have a problem there and I admit you are really thinking about it deeply.

there are 3 kinds of problems in life

the ones, you can deal with yourself

the ones that you need to work with others to fix and sort out

and the ones you can’t do anything about

 

ok, giggles, here is a simple trick to dealing with problems,

take the problem and visual it turning into a orange,

giggles yeah a orange, turn the problem into a lot of sections like a orange, instead of seeing it as one big problem

like a orange, problems is seen as a whole thing, and what you are doing,

seeing the whole problem, and that creates the * orange skin* around it.

ok, peel away the things around the problem, like peeling away the skin of the orange and, hey, awesome, we can see the sections of the orange.

ok, that was easy, giggles, and now we are going to break up the orange into sections, so we can look at each of them.

ok a section is the person involved, ( use a different section for each person)

a section is the main areas involved in the problem ( use different sections )

( am going to use 3 people for my problem and I am going to use a relationship problem (cos they are so common) as the base for my orange)

the problem is my partner will not talk to me and I am getting angry

ok now, in my hand I hold 3 people sections and 4 problems sections

( why 4 problem sections?? , well, simple.)

I will call the problem sections PS for short

PROBLEM SECTIONS

PS1 my partner is not talking to me

PS2 I can’t talk to my partner about it

PS 3 it is affecting our relationship

PS4 I am letting the problem screw me up and I am hassling everybody about it and not looking at how to deal with it

PEOPLE SECTIONS

PS5 my partner who is not talking

PS6 me who is not talking about it to my partner and talking to everybody else

PS7 everybody else I am talking to about it

ok well, such a simple problem has turned really big now that I look at it fully

but hey out of 7 sections I can get rid of PS4 by accepting that there is a problem there and doing something about it instead of telling everybody else all about it and not actually talking to my partner

ok look at PS1 why is my partner not talking, ok, if I look around them, I may find an answer as to why we have the problem

my partner is not talking to me ABOUT the problem, but he is talking to me

maybe, they feels unable to talk about it at this stage, maybe they can’t handle it at this stage but are unsure about how to open up about it.

ok looking at PS1/ 2, I know my partner has a problem that they don’t talk about, ok I WILL accept that by saying to them, I am here to talk with you.

is getting on their back about it really going to help?????

also, how is your partner going to feel if you are telling people on the net and not opening a door for you both to talk about it

ok lets look at all the problem sections again

PS1 my partner is not talking to me

PS2 I can’t talk to my partner about it

PS 3 it is affecting our relationship

PS4 I am letting the problem screw me up and I am hassling everybody about it and not looking at how to deal with it

PS5 my partner who is not talking

PS6 me who is not talking about it to my partner and talking to everybody else

PS7 everybody else I am talking to about it

 

and lets look at how far we have come with it

 

PS1 my partner is not talking to me (they are trying to deal with it)

PS2 I can’t talk to my partner about it ( I am trying to make them talk about it)

PS 3 it is affecting our relationship ( how is it affecting us, or is it affecting me)

PS4 I am letting the problem screw me up and I am hassling everybody about it and not looking at how to deal with it( why are you getting screwed up???)

PS5 my partner who is not talking (is it really that bad)

PS6 me who is not talking about it to my partner and talking to everybody else

I am part of the problem now, by making it my problem)

PS7 everybody else I am talking to about it ( I am involving everybody)

 

look at the orange again please, and take you out of the orange

 

PS1 my partner is not talking to me about something

PS5 my partner is not talking

 

oh hell, that is amazing

it is so easy to create a problem where that is not really a great issue

my partner is not talking about something that is not affecting the way we live and the way our relationship goes, but I feel that they have to talk about it with me. I feel that it is affecting our relationship and I am getting angry and screwed up cos I confront them about it and I expect them to talk and they don’t, so I am telling everybody about this problem that is not affecting our relationship, but I choose to see it as a problem that is screwing up the relationship.

 

Want another drink?? my friend, and yes, most problems are along the same lines too, they are actually not as bad or as big as we make them out to be

try using the orange to see if you can break down your problems to find a easier way of dealing with them or solving them.

btw, there will be times when the problem is not able to be sorted out that easily

then you have two other ways of dealing with the problems

one is to spend your life complaining and feeling sorry for yourself

the other is to leave it all behind and start over again in your life

and please don’t look at me like that either, cos I have done it before in my life so I do know how hard it can be.

giggles how you ever noticed you are better at solving other peoples problems

it is because you are seeing the full picture, when in your own life, you are not looking at the full picture

sorry about the noise, my cat snores loudly, giggles, but I love him so much

so, does you day seem a bit better now, good to hear, life is not bad, it is how we choose to view it.

here is a parting joke for you to enjoy and think about

surgeons have developed a new operation called a craptotomy, this operation is now available for people who have a direct connect between their eyeballs and rectum, this operation will help them to stop having a shitty view of life

hugs ya and loves ya , poet